RALPH NADER STINKS ON ICE by D. Doph

beyond beyond . 52

Once we all had prehensile tails but they've been gone
for ever so long
Stephen Foster was once the musical rage
he's forgotten on wings of song
Bette Davis was once a very young girl
everyone thought she was nice
Once Ralph Nader was politically correct;
but now he stinks on ice.

New Orleans was once the Queen of the River
now she sinks in a swamp
Christie Alley could once make me twink like a mink
she's now three hundred pounds of rump
Speaking of minks, those deplorable thinks
could never be eaten with rice
And the way a mink thinks is all knotted in kinks
like the way Nader stinks on ice

Our Afghansitan bases were once safe places
and W still lives in a bubble
A Guantanamo vet was once waterboard wet
but they're all in terrible trouble
I once was in love with my looking glass
but I'm tired of my terrible self
But there's nothing muleskinned as the stinking wind
when you get downwind of Ralph

Ralph Nader! Ralph Nader! What makes your arteries so hard
Dispensable Ralph Nader Just get back down in the yard
We once called you The Spoiler; and quaked in your presence
But now you're known as The Skunk with your putrified essence

So try to dump on Obama; he's more Teflon than Ronnie
No, Ralph; you're just old and that's not even funny
Your burrs attract curs and your flogger's not welting
And the ice on which you stink is casually melting

Let's forget about Ralph Nader The Spoiler of Old
His spikes have turned to rubber; the rest has gone to mold
He's sinking like the Titanic in a veritable trice
And in case you've forgotten the fucker is rotten
and he stinks to hell on ice.