ARMY STRONG by Dennis Doph

beyond beyond . 58

Above the bus seat above my head and to the left
The US ARMY has a recruiting pitch of calculated heft
US ARMY (ARMY STRONG) it sez:
then they dive into the trough
With a money laden pitch to jerk you poor dumb kids off

There's a $71K college fund for those of you who
can actually read
Another $40 K enlistment bonus for those of you
who are in dire need
All you patriotic redneck boys and physical education slags
Can count upon being airlifted to Afghanistan
and shipped outta there in body bags

Or you will be cannon fodder for two hot wars
Bush & Co are planning in Iran
Our ever ready CIA is revving up the ante
so they can rise up all Baluchistan
For you geographically-challenged high school kids
Batman, Ironman and Spider-Man nerds
The CIA is planning another red hot war
to rise up all the Iranian Kurds

So three cheers for Captain Spaulding
the US ARMY recruiter
With overwhelming riffs of Groucho Marx
who never would have been this kind of shooter
Make sure to email Patrick.Spaulding@usarec.army.mil
to let him know on no uncertain terms
how this latest Army pitch gives you a thrill
And if you're still infused with McCain-driven testosterone
and hate like any normal kipper
Use earplugs for the first round of mortar fire
...you won't need 'em for the last ZIP of that zipper