THE VERY LAST by Dennis Doph

out there . 14

I have seen the very last Concert
For the last time I've submitted myself
That's right submitted myself
To the crush The smell The failed old theatre
Theatre too big Too old Lousy acoustics
Rancid canned-Margarita audience Popsies
Gone bad gone very bad intermingled
Intermingled

With former popsies now middleaged whores
Trolling their dredged-out husbands
To the Concert In the old barn of a movie palace
with lousy acoustics where the Band is

the Band
Secondrate ska and/or reggae group
of dubious distinction Makes a very large
Bad noise The crowd BlackBerrying
to all their friends They rise
All of them rise

All of them except me and my partner who
Needed to submit himself one last time
I rose for the Stones Rose for the Dead
Rose for Big Brother and the Holding Company
and Janis I will not rise for this lousy
Secondrate ska band and their dry ice
I will not rise to be part of this Burmashave crowd

Lesbians clutching each other BlackBerrying
Women twelve seats away in the same theater

Havent we got fun?
Isnt it grand?
Isnt it swell?
This is bitchin
This is farrrrrrrrrrr out

Oh no it isn't Popsies It isn't anything but BAD
Sixtysomething ushers with their well groomed
Beautyparlor henna-does shine flashlights
in their punked-out faces Greasy
with misapplied makeup smeared
by their fat fingers Well

How can you apply makeup and still clutch
Your BlackBerry in your fat hand?
Lesbian Popsies in front of us scream
Rock n Roll ! While what is being performed
in front of us isn't rock 'n roll It is dreck

Dredge myself through the experience
The Backup Band Some mismatched pickup group
Fatboys from San Luis Obispo So bad
Have to go to the john Come back to my seat
Perform reflexology on all of my fingers
Arthritis-cramped Dupuytrons-cyst riddled
Middleaged fingers Sinking
Deep deep into a state of disattached boredom
concentrating on my fingers

Then when the Band comes on
I'm already Gone Gone back home
To sink into the pain of my aching hands
My aching head Wanting to be anywhere
but here

Not wanting to make a Scene
Making a Scene in spite of myself
Sinking deeper deeper into the investigation
of my fingers So When the Band comes on
Dry ice machine fills the hall with stink
BlackBerrying lesbians with their ripped n torn outfits
Rise shakily on platform shoes

I pray for Lillian Roxon Rock n roll critic
for the Voice Came into Fillmore East
To see the Band the real Band
Fell and broke her fucking neck Falling
down the stairs off her platforms
Pray for Lillian Roxon How I wish
These fucking lesbians would fall off their platforms
Still BlackBerrying And die

My partner takes me home before the secondrate
Ska band has finished their first number
We have the last two pieces of blackberry pie
Real blackberries We have never had BlackBerrys
clutched in our hands
never will